This past June, King Juan Carlos I of Spain abdicated the throne in favour of his son, Felipe. Some say that the event, the fourth abdication of a European monarch in around a year (after those of Beatrix of the Netherlands, Albert II of Belgium, and Pope Benedict XVI, of, Popeland), represents a new, younger generation of monarchs that are expected to rejuvenate faltering economies and improve the public's faith in a single hereditary leader for a nation. The reality, unfortunately, proves much more sinister. As with most former Great Powers in Europe, Spain maintains numerous small colonies and territories around the world. More numerous than their directly-controlled lands, however, is territory claimed within the King's official titles. That is to say, the King's unilateral claims to rule. It may be unsurprising to learn that Felipe VI is also titled King of Castile, Leon, Aragon, Navarre, &c. as these are all historically constituents of Spain, but a full reading of the titles reveals that this royal Spaniard has the domination of much more than Iberia in mind. Of note, he styles himself also as the King of the Two Sicilies, which consists of all of southern Italy, Duke of Burgundy, Archduke of Austria, and even lord of the millennium-old Kingdom of Jerusalem. In this map, brown indicates land currently ruled by Felipe, orange represents land he directly claims, and the peach-colour shows land maintained by the titles usually abbreviated "etc." in public works. Barely even recognizable The purple regions show reasonable borders for the Byzantine Empire, the last ruler of which sold Emperor-ship to Ferdinand II and Isabella I in 1502. Also extremely telling of his titles is "[King] of the Islands and Mainland of the Ocean Sea" which effectively claims all of the Americas for Spain. His father Juan Carlos served as the president of the Ibero-American States Organization, no doubt to lay the groundwork for the unification of the Spanish-speaking world under one Emperor. And he doesn't think anyone's on to him. But We Know
Not that anyone will read this, but here is WHAT Felipe VI of Spain is, in order from highest rank to lowest: -Roman Emperor (Byzantine) -King of Spain, Hungary, Dalmatia, Croatia, Castile, Leon, Aragon, the Two Sicilies, Jerusalem, Navarre, Granada, Toledo, Valencia, Galicia, Majorca, Seville, Sardinia, Cordoba, Corsica, Murcia, Menorca, Jaen, the Algarves, Algeciras, Gibraltar, the Canary Islands, the East Indies and West Indies, and the Islands and Mainland of the Ocean Sea -Viscount of Evil -Archduke of Austria -Duke of Burgundy, Brabant, Milan, Athens, Neopatras, Limburg, Lorraine, Luxembourg, Gelderland, Styria, Carniola, Carinthia, and Wuerttemberg -Prince of Swabia, and Achaea -Landgrave of Alsace -CFO of America-Hating -Marquis of Oristano, and Goceano -Margrave of the Holy Roman Empire, and Burgau -Count Palatine of Burgundy -Unpleasant of Demeanor -Count of Habsburg, Flanders, Tyrol, Roussillon, Barcelona, Artois, Heinaut, Namur, Gorizia, Haut-Rhin, and Kyburg -Lord of Biscay, Molina, Salins, Mechelen, the Slovenian March, Pordenone, and Tripoli -Despot of Morea -Also a Monster
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January 2022
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